It is just after 8 am, the condo we are in is quiet, serene and yet surrounded by activity. Somehow, the hustle and bustle of the gulls as they swoop in and around the beach looking for those unlucky crustaceans who were foolhardy enough to venture close to the shore just adds to the calm.
I have just finished Beau and Phantom’s morning constitutional and they have crawled back into bed with Alex. Alex is sound asleep and the boys love that. I swear the three of them are part cat. They would sleep 18 hours a day if they could. Alex would do so because he has struggled for so long to find the right balance in his life. The boys, on the other hand, would sleep because it is so GLORIOUS to be that carefree.
Phantom has become a snorer. Almost as bad as me, apparently.
Beau just snuggles up as close to any source of heat as he can. His favourite position is splayed out UNDER the covers with his back up against a leg, back, chest or butt. He is an equal opportunity heat seeking dog.
Anyways, back to me. I am sitting in a comfortable chair, feet up, sipping on a hot mug of tea and reflecting on nothing in particular. The waves are lapping on the beach and the sky is grey. Not the ominous grey that foretells a day of incessant rain, like yesterday, but the grey that drifts over the West coast reminding residents that the days of sunshine are coming but, only when they are damn good and ready.
It is these quiet times that give me enough time to just be. Ok, I love these times.
Not just these times. I LOVE my life. I am married to an amazing man who puts me above everyone and everything else (except his daughter, the dogs, the rabbits, the fish, the birds and his plants, of course). I have a nice home. It isn’t much, but, it is mine. I have the best “logical family” in the world. I have great jobs – yes, I said “jobs”. I have a few dollars in the bank. We are debt free with the exception of the car loan and our mortgage.
I am healthy – for the most part.
I am content.
There are sad parts, though. My Mom’s descent into dementia fills me with a degree of sadness that I have a hard time articulating. I wish I was closer to her so I could spend more time with her. I am lucky, though that I can afford to fly to see her once a month.
But, when I do see her, she beams at me. Her world, just for a moment, seems less confusing, less scary, and less lonely. At least, I hope it is. We spend hours together and just talk. I have taken a small recorder with me so I can record her memories. The memories of her youth are the most powerful ones she had. We talk about her parents, grandparents, siblings, aunts, uncles, cousins. Anything to help lift the veil for just a moment. And in those moments, fleeting, though they are, I see My Mom. She is there and she is happy.
Today, when Alex gets up, we will head to the beach. We will take the boys and let them dig in the sand, chase gulls and just be.
Sounds like an awesome way to spend a day, doesn’t it?
Until next time.
Al Zylstra 